You are not alone on this issue. We are seeing very long query responses especially considering how large our users table is now.
In general queries do no seem very efficient even with a very powerful server we are still getting upwards of 8 to 9 second query load times. Will be trying some additional indexing and possible partitioning of bp_activity and wp_users and wp_usermeta to see if that helps.
@joesell89 – Did you ever come up with a solution for this? We are considering writing re-writing the Widget to use a transient object or something.
